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It is currently Sun Oct 06, 2024 11:22 am
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redalert150
Team:
Main: 1-800-USE_THE_FORCE!
Level: 2907 Class:
Berserker
Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2005 6:36 pm
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Make us laugh!
A cop pulls over an old lady for speeding on a Texas highway. He ask for her drivers license and registration. When she opens her wallet, he notices a conceal carry permit. He asks, "Ma'am, do you have a weapon in your possession at this time?" She responds that she has a .38 Special in her purse. And a .45 in her glove box. And a 9mm Glock in the center console. And a shotgun in the trunk. "Jesus, lady," says the cop. "What are you so afraid of?" The old lady looks him in the eyes and says, "Not a fucking thing."
ha. Anyone have something funnier?
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 1:35 am |
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ellinium
Team:
Main: E11inium
Level: 65 Class:
Gunner
Joined: Fri May 19, 2006 9:18 pm Location: MA, USA
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Re: Make us laugh!
Perhaps you remember me from pimps n hoes =P
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 9:01 am |
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Tomzta09
Team:
Main: Combustion
Level: 5116 Class:
Berserker
Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2009 2:57 pm Location: United Kingdom
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Re: Make us laugh!
3 people, one called Fuck off, one called Shit, One called Manners. They are all walking down the street, Shit slips and breaks his ankle, Manners stays with him and Fuck off runs to a police station to ask for help.
Fuck off says to the policeman "We need help! someone has just badly broke their ankle round the corner!" The policeman says "Ok but first I need to know your name" Fuck off says "Fuck Off", Policeman says "I Beg your pardon..." "Fuck off!" Policeman says "Where are your Manner's boy?" Fuck off says "Manner's is round the corner picking up Shit"
_________________ NEXT HYPE
XxTommyxX, Daedalus, Combustion, Dr Eggman, Dr Combustica, Joew121, fghetfs
password wrote: dang trevor....you take this game so serious
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:09 pm |
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ellinium
Team:
Main: E11inium
Level: 65 Class:
Gunner
Joined: Fri May 19, 2006 9:18 pm Location: MA, USA
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Re: Make us laugh!
Actually there are people with names similar to that in China. There was a news report about a group of friends getting into a misunderstanding with the police because of that.
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:34 pm |
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Griffin
Team:
Main: Stabberz
Level: 2153 Class:
Gunner
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2007 10:55 am
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Re: Make us laugh!
ellinium wrote: Actually there are people with names similar to that in China. There was a news report about a group of friends getting into a misunderstanding with the police because of that. If it weren't for you citing a police report we know nothing about, I might have not believed you. Thanks.
_________________
Blue Dwarf wrote: In space, no one can hear you cha cha cha.
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 12:44 pm |
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redalert150
Team:
Main: 1-800-USE_THE_FORCE!
Level: 2907 Class:
Berserker
Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2005 6:36 pm
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Re: Make us laugh!
ellinium wrote: Perhaps you remember me from pimps n hoes =P I'm original 80/80 your probably thinking about my brother, he plays on Fox now pm him in game.
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:09 pm |
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redalert150
Team:
Main: 1-800-USE_THE_FORCE!
Level: 2907 Class:
Berserker
Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2005 6:36 pm
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Re: Make us laugh!
Common funny people post some jokes!!
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Sat Feb 18, 2012 3:10 pm |
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landswimmer
Team:
Main: DemonBlood
Level: 1761 Class:
Shield Monkey
Joined: Tue Jul 01, 2008 1:09 am
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Re: Make us laugh!
Griffin wrote: ellinium wrote: Actually there are people with names similar to that in China. There was a news report about a group of friends getting into a misunderstanding with the police because of that. If it weren't for you citing a police report we know nothing about, I might have not believed you. Thanks. this is win.
_________________ it is the mark of an educated man, to entertain a thought without accepting it. - aristotle
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Sun Feb 19, 2012 2:33 am |
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HitmanCaius
Joined: Wed Jan 28, 2009 12:25 pm Location: Romania-Bucharest-Unu Mai-Nr 88
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Re: Make us laugh!
Tomzta09 wrote: 3 people, one called Fuck off, one called Shit, One called Manners. They are all walking down the street, Shit slips and breaks his ankle, Manners stays with him and Fuck off runs to a police station to ask for help.
Fuck off says to the policeman "We need help! someone has just badly broke their ankle round the corner!" The policeman says "Ok but first I need to know your name" Fuck off says "Fuck Off", Policeman says "I Beg your pardon..." "Fuck off!" Policeman says "Where are your Manner's boy?" Fuck off says "Manner's is round the corner picking up Shit" Wish I could quote this in my signature. It is decently funny ^^
_________________
JeffL wrote: "Come have sex with me in space, my lord". The Salty One wrote: "Hur Hur someone 20X my level in a massive dreadnought... POKE"
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Sun Feb 19, 2012 4:06 pm |
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Camsy
Team:
Main: PM Me If You Suck
Level: 1996 Class:
Gunner
Joined: Fri Nov 28, 2008 6:03 pm Location: Sydney, Australia
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Re: Make us laugh!
A man walks into a bar, he goes up to the bar tender and orders a beer. The bar tender says "Your american right?" The man replies "yeah how did you know? Was it the beer I ordered, or my accent?" The bar tender replied, "Neither, your the fattest fuck I've ever seen!"
_________________
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Sun Feb 19, 2012 4:17 pm |
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Makka
Team:
Main: Yehaaaaaaaaaaa
Level: 2372 Class:
Engineer
Joined: Wed Apr 02, 2008 9:26 am Location: West Australia
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Re: Make us laugh!
^^ I really like that one.
Anyway, what did the blonde say when she walked into the bar?
"Shit that hurt!!"
_________________ "The weirdness of America: 250 million wankers living in a country with no word for wanker". Jeremy Clarkson, 1999.
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Mon Feb 20, 2012 6:47 am |
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Mail
Team:
Main: Time Warp
Level: 3162 Class:
Shield Monkey
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2008 5:59 am Location: Australia
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Re: Make us laugh!
Two blondes, out at night. Blonde 1 says: "Hey, what's further away from us? The moon or England?", Blonde 2 replied: "Pfft! Don't be stupid, can you SEE England from here?".
An Irishman wins the lottery and builds a rocket. On the day of his depature eveyrone asks, "Where will you be flyin' wit that thin' you got there?", he replies, "The sun ofcourse.", they all shout in chorus: "ARE YOU CRAZY?! You'll turn into a burnt potato!", the builder simply said, "Don't be silly, I'm going at night."
A string walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "Sorry bud, strings aren't allowed in here.", the string left, shamefully, and sat on th side walk. He rolled on the concrete and tangled himself up. He walks back into the bar and orders the same drink to which the bartender replies: "Oi! Didn't I just kick you out for being a string?", the String replies, "I'm afraid not, sorry."
(My favourite)(Check Black text if you're stupid)
For the stupid ones... A Frayed Knot.... A fraid not. Noobs.
What were the famous last words of the Mafia hitman? "Who the F**K put a violin in my violin case?!"
All I can be bothered to type out.
Timmeh
_________________ Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so.
~Oscar Wilde
andezrhode2a wrote: Timmeh is the exception to every rule. Battlecruiser23 wrote: /Timmeh! I mean /signed! sabre198 wrote: 1. Create C2 2. Time Warp quits 3. New players join 4. ... Profit?!?
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Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:02 am |
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Visorak
Team:
Main: Radia
Level: 1101 Class:
Speed Demon
Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2007 6:04 pm Location: q3dm17
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Re: Make us laugh!
Mail wrote: All I can be bothered to type out.
Timmeh
What kind of noob doesn't copypasta?
_________________
Jey123456 wrote: That will happen in a future closer than most futures. No Context. Ever. Idaten.
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Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:19 am |
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Mail
Team:
Main: Time Warp
Level: 3162 Class:
Shield Monkey
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2008 5:59 am Location: Australia
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Re: Make us laugh!
Visorak wrote: Mail wrote: All I can be bothered to type out.
Timmeh
What kind of noob doesn't copypasta? I was typing from memory.
Timmeh
_________________ Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so.
~Oscar Wilde
andezrhode2a wrote: Timmeh is the exception to every rule. Battlecruiser23 wrote: /Timmeh! I mean /signed! sabre198 wrote: 1. Create C2 2. Time Warp quits 3. New players join 4. ... Profit?!?
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Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:33 am |
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Visorak
Team:
Main: Radia
Level: 1101 Class:
Speed Demon
Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2007 6:04 pm Location: q3dm17
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Re: Make us laugh!
Ok, so yeah.
Answer:
Princess Diana’s death.
Question:
Why?
Answer:
An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, driving a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whiskey,followed closely by Italian paparazzi on Japanese motorcycles;treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines. This is sent to you by an American, using Bill Gate’s technology and you are probably reading this on your computer,that uses Taiwanese chips and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant; transported by Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by Indonesians affiliated to Somali pirates, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen and trucked to you by illegal Mexican workers…
And that, my friends is what Globalization is.
Lost the game * (never gonna give you up,never gonna let you down) = manual breathing + manual blinking. GOOD NEWS EVERYONE! you are now thinking about her you are now breathing manually you are now blinking manually you now have "the final countdown" stuck in your head there is now a part on your body that itches you are reading this in the voice of professor farnsworth you now have to yawn you are now manually swallowing you now have to piss you just realised you are leaning on your left hand
you read this first
_________________
Jey123456 wrote: That will happen in a future closer than most futures. No Context. Ever. Idaten.
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Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:39 am |
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