Rated: 30H's

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2V4VxlsMuQ4

BP scum.

I was like ooh!

Then I was like, oh!

Then I was like, AHH!

Psh! Those get GREAT reviews! That all the reviews are from teenage girls is irrelevant (pssst, it's about a dissasociative personality vampire who discovers that vampires are really interstellar space marine shock troops, reveals an ancient conspiracy, finds out that vampires really have telekinesis and run on cold fusion, finds out that the original werewolves were actually impingements of the Elder Gods from the Cthulhuian mythos into our reality, BEFRIENDS one of these eldritch abominations, turns a narwhal into a vampire before killing it moby dick style, takes its horn as a trophy, sharpens the horn, uses its anti-gluonic properties to make it into the ultimate anti-vampire sword, clones herself 13 times and puts all the personalities into seperate bodies, breaks through as a spark, goes into the final confrontation with the alien overlords, discovers she has infinite cosmic powers, transcends reality, and ultimately goes to an infinite number of possible realities to awaken an infinite number of copies of herself to wage an infinite number of wars against tyranny and anti-love)

Seriously though, Cthulhuian tentacle rape IS pretty hard to beat...except with even worse Cthulhuian tentacle rape. Which I have seen. Some of it is actually pretty good. Like this one Cthulhuian Tentacle Rape doujin I read once, where it was pretty much normal, except it was the schoolgirls raping the tentacle monsters!

But there is one...thing...that I saw once. It was so terrifying, so mind-numbingly horrific, that my head literally hurts just thinking about it, even now, 3-4 years after watching it. I will never tell you, or anyone else, it's name. But it's still there...inside me...

...

I don't like Jersery Shore.

Fixed.